This “poem” brought to you by Mr. Chris Zawadzki:
23 years ago, Kelly emerged from Vaginaland
Kicking and screaming, like she was in a fetal band
In her younger days, she hit balls and played with oars,
Wrote messages on dollar bills and made fun of whores
Now, she says things like OMG, ROFLMAO and For Realz,
Has JD blackouts and loves bento box meals
In 23 years, Kelly will be writing copy or taking photos
Or fronting a band called The Galapagogos
Whatever she may do, or whoever she may be
She is already a kick-ass chick at 23.
Happy Birthday KID!
